I'm not going to get arrested today!

I finally got paid at my new job! Imagine my surprise (and consternation) at being told on my fifth day of work that I would a) be paid once a month and b) I'd have to wait six weeks to actually see the first check. While I almost laid hands upon the woman who broke that news, I controlled myself with the help of another new coworker. After calming down and wiping the rage from the corners of the mouth, we talked to the head nurse, who hooked it up so we got paid after the fourth week. I'm as happy as a clam about this recent turn of events. Friends, you no longer have to miracle me at the bar, take my limp excuses about not having any cash, or worry about me asking to borrow $300. Now its my turn to buy a round; hit me up!